Award yourself for the small things because they

Award yourself for the small things because they are not so small💙

I have been very low on my self esteem lately, TBH i have been just tired for everything and for the jolly happy all the time kinda person that i am it is a big deal. I am growing introvert, I had one of those Confidence that would shoot and intimidate everyone else’s confidence just by presence.

For me even the smallest things have been difficult lately like having dinner or even serving it for myself I have been dealing with great kinda determination required for just any of this.

My definition of what is right and what is wrong is changing everyday, I am the same person who thought smoking is bad, I am the same person who has smoked non stop since 3days thinking that once in a while it’s okay, My throat has reached a point where it’s sore due to constant liquor lately, and i feel no guilt of it.

I have become a person who listens to sad songs just because it’s soothes me and I don’t want to be that person. Am i a person with no emotion? Or I am?

Today morning I got in an auto rickshaw and gave 20rs to the auto driver he was supposed to return 10rs back and I just was so scared on the backseat to take it back or even ask for it that’s when I realised its getting serious i am going in deep shit while we reached station I convinced myself the whole time to ask for that Rs10. And i would award myself if I did that, No it isn’t about that 10rs note, it is about realising how I have gone in deep shit while ignoring the smallest possible thing to focus on bigger things.

I asked him for my money and he gave it back, I just had to ask. I am not going to give in, I am not going to let anything affect my self esteem now onwards.

Right now I bought a chocolate for myself as I want to treat myself for the brace thing that I did.

Have a great day ahead.

Now on I’m gonna make a routine for every small achievement that i have done to boost my self esteem. It’s TIME